Friday, December 31, 2010

给我的威廉王子

致:亲爱的威廉王子

就忽然有这念头,想给你写封信。还记得那一夜,我们一家躺床上,为你取名字的夜晚。想了很多,然后妈说:叫威廉吧,和威廉王子一样。是啊,在我们心里你是王子,永远都是。

今年我二十,你十二。纵使八年的鸿沟隔在我俩之间,而我们总是能够以自己的方式来表达我们的爱,也许那是一种本能吧。每次回家你就会扛着你所有宝贝浩浩荡荡走进我的房间。然后抱着你的吉他,炫耀你的进度。然后你开始表演你最新学会的魔术,忙上忙下找适合的道具。还有那些有时真的很没脑的冷笑话,弄到我哭笑不得。一直都是这样,你会找各样的借口赖在我的房间崔了几次都不肯回房睡。我嘴上总会埋怨,但心里难免但心,有一天你会否再也不想呆在这里,甚至不让我进入你的心房。

一直以来我都希望有个哥哥,那男孩呢,就要有姐姐。虽然有时凶巴巴,可还不是拜你所赐叻。。。害我现在老是唠唠叨叨的,不过那也是为你好啊!身为家里的长女,很多时候东西都要自己慢慢摸索,很多时候甚至爸妈也帮不上忙,毕竟离他们还真的有一段时间了。没有习惯性的依赖,很多时候要自己闯,经历,跌倒,学习强悍和面对。不过你心情在谷底时,我可以当你的聆听者,不用什么事都得自己撑着,我知道爸爸妈妈总为小事担忧,所以我会替你分担,当你的垃圾桶。

长大的感觉可谓百感交加,不过要记得无论发生任何事都不要离开教会,对上帝绝望。哪怕是感情亮红灯,学业逊色,或人际关系充满了争执时。我们一直都知道万事都有祂的美意,但要做到的是-坚定地相信。不要对上帝失望,这是我们的原则,要守住它。悄悄地告诉你吧,女孩喜欢有原则的男孩。

你这小家伙天资聪明,学习方面,不比像我们那样拚命,也始终不能适应像我们一样,花几个小时专注读书。训了你几百次,结果还是一样。唯有接受你自己的方式,只要你成绩不赖就好了。如果有一天你跌倒了,不要放弃,因为不是你的能力有限,你只是习惯性没有尽全力而已。所以爬起来,深呼吸,尽力再试一次。信我,我知道你可以的。

告诉你一个秘密吧,其实我并没有你想象中的那么强,每次你问我的歌,我都懂叫什么名。其实是我知道你喜欢,所以平时会特地去看有什么新歌,或是叫朋友介绍。还有像相机,电脑之类的很多时候,你是我花时间在它们身上的动力。因为我喜欢和你一起竞争,一起研究,还有厉害过你时那小小的骄傲xp

明天就是崭新的一年,对我俩都是新的旅程杯。踏入中学,希望你能好好享受每个日子。无论是甜酸苦辣,后来都会成为美丽的回忆。愿我们能更像基督,为主发光作盐。巴不得你现在就读懂这些,却不舍你那么快就离开那再也回不去的少年。这信,暂时就有我保管吧!

爱你,
大姐笔

Thursday, December 30, 2010

生病


哇啦。。。太久没有生病
一病就超辛苦>.<
不过也好,提醒我们自己健康的时候
就要好好爱自己,不要无病呻吟
随便心情不好
S.M.I.L.E

我有个怪毛病,
听到有人,把鼻涕倒吸回喉咙,
我就觉得超恶心,全身起鸡皮疙瘩
中四那年,又个朋友坐在我前面
遍遍她就不能顶,人家把鼻涕崔出来
然后每次我们旁边的朋友伤风,
就很可怜,因为崔出来就会被她骂
倒吸,就被我骂。。。进退两难。。。哈!

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Time for a change

Found myself wanting to blog again.
well, definitely, i feel very emo now.
now, 20, i find myself often worrying about so many things
if only i am a kid.
but the Lord taught us to be thankful.

Even now, i feel like i haven't mastered anything.
i learned piano when i was young,
sang when i was 3,
dreamed of being a scientist when i was 9,
picked up guitar when i was a teen,
learned cooking in my high school days,
found my interest in art when i was making birthday cards,
realised my passion for kids while working in a kindergarten.
But now, i noticed that i am not good at anything.
i feel useless.
this feeling of self-pity and dissatisfaction hits me deeply.
many friends have their own field of talent.
some sings till it touches your heart,
some plays musical instruments so well,
while others take beautiful pictures of people.
i can't help but searching my purpose in this life.
i keep asking God what i am destined for.
even though i haven't find any,
but i know that since the day He saved my life,
i was born for a purpose.
while in the surgery room,
He could have brought me home.
but he did not.
He showed me His grace and mercy,
determined to make me stay on earth,
there is definitely a reason for it.
nothing happens accidentally.

My Prayer:
I pray that i may find my purpose soon.
Lord break my heart from what breaks Your's
and
As I live my life for You,
may I be a blessing to others.